Unsung Heroes

While I had a great Mother’s Day, I’m becoming increasingly aware that there are thousands of mothers out there who did not. I’m not talking about mothers who abuse, berate, or abandon their offspring. I’m talking about deserving mothers who are up before dawn to get breakfast ready (even if it means getting the cereal out of the pantry), find matching shoes and socks, wash that special pair of jeans, look over homework, listen to woes and worries, attend sporting events despite utter fatigue, sacrifice time and money for her children’s needs, and on and on and on. Really, I know many mothers like this who remain “unsung heroes” even on the one day set aside to honor them.

I know that some children are too young to even know what’s going on, but in this case, dads could step in to shop for Mom.  Truthfully, however, it’s not the little kids that I have an issue with. It’s the older ones, the ones who are old enough to be aware of all their mothers do and to show appreciation…even if It’s just a hug, a sappy card, or one little prepared meal…including buying the ingredients and washing the dishes. The meal doesn’t  have to be spectacular; the only criteria is that it’s something SHE likes. After all, SHE is always buying and preparing things you like; if not, you’re whiny and pouty and complaining.

I also have a beef with the fathers of these kids who not only fall short in helping to make it a special day but who also join in the criticism. “Hey, Hon, these mashed potatoes are a little lumpy.” To add insult to injury, they might say, “Why should I give something to you? You’re not my mother.”  Hmmm. Maybe not, but she’s the woman who carried and delivered YOUR children and who is currently nurturing and raising them while you watch sporting events, play golf, read, spend time with your buds, or go hunting or fishing.

This post isn’t intended to bash all fathers and children, just the ones who abuse, ignore, take advantage of the women in their lives. The next time you take a pair of socks out of the drawer, ask yourself how they got there. When you moan about the fact that your mother or wife doesn’t  experiment with new recipes, take a look in the refrigerator and ask yourself who shopped for the goodies. Oh, and you might want to remind yourself that since she’s often working a full-time job outside of the home, she doesn’t always feel like whipping up culinary delights on her “second shift.” She’ s too busy washing your clothes, Kiddo.

Author: jayne bowers

*married with children, stepchildren, grandchildren, in-laws, ex-laws, and a host of other family members and fabulous friends *semi-retired psychology instructor at two community colleges *writer

8 thoughts on “Unsung Heroes”

  1. Go Jayne!!! Sometimes we moms are overlooked for all that we do, just the every day ordinary things where the house would fall apart if we didn’t do them things.

  2. The fact that men and children take Mom for granted is no surprise, which is one reason why we put aside a WHOLE DAY to honor mothers. I say these Moms, whoever they are, go on strike!

    If that’s to in-your-face for them, perhaps they could deal with a ‘family emergency’ that coincidentally puts them in Vegas with their sister for a week. Whatever it takes to drive the point home.

  3. Amen to that Kristi!

    Hayden, One of my friends learned how to tackle this “taking women for granted” issue early in her marriage. Her husband would always take off his socks and toss them under the bed. Like a sweet, doting little wife (a newlywed), she would search for all of his dirty clothes and dutifully wash them. Then she grew very weary of it and began to get angry. She asked him to please put his socks in the dirty laundry…to no avail. She asked again…still, he tossed his socks under the bed as if he hadn’t heard her. So she decided not to get them out…just to leave them there. One day he came to her and said in a wondering, puzzled voice, “I can’t find any socks. Do you know where any are?” She told him she didn’t know where any clean ones were but that there were probably plenty of dirty ones under the bed. He was in shock. “Am I supposed to wear dirty socks?” he asked. Lynn, my friend, answered by saying, “Depends on whether you want to wear socks to work or not.”

    I loved that story then, and I still get some enjoyment out of it.

  4. i am sorry but i hate to shop…ony at mole wart for food to sustain life..once every few months….and i will wear socks under a bed, the air would have got to them and most of the smell would be gone by then

  5. Barlow, my pal you are a piece of work!!! 🙂 reminds me of my brother, he would sniff items of clothing to see if he had an extra days wear in them!

    I realize how lucky I am to have children that do special things for me even on days that aren’t set aside specifically for that. Of course, they are married now…so more fully appreciate all that women do. Even so, I always got a card or some expression of gratitude even when they “hated” me!

  6. I loved this post! My husband actually commented…I didnt thing material things or a stupid card meant so much. It does! A DR I worked with explained not so tastefully as you have done exactly why this is the mans responsibility. I wont repeat the words here!

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